careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
