she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
