just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
