Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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