Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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