I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
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