This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Randomize
