Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
