ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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