kristin has been a bad kristin
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
