who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
