Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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