THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize