GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
