ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
