it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize