Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
