Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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