so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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