Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize