she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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