the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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