Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
