he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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