If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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