I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
