All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I could make wine with my vomit
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
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