yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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