do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
my being single is dangerous.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
