i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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