That's intense
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
