Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
