Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
