Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
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