K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
