She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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