Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize