You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Your cock deserves a montage
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
