Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
