I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize