Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
