If that was your dad, he is hot
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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