He is such a slut. More and more my type.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
