his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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