you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
