oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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