Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize