is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
