think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
