Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize