Where did you get a picture of my penis
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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