I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
